Oh,To be Bald Like Me!

1) Social Encounters: The bald clean head becomes a separate person attached to your body, like an obnoxious twin whom you absorbed at the time of your birth. People will talk to you but look at the twin.
"Hey man, how are you?" (Words told to me, eyes looking at my bald spots)
"You are going bald bro!" (Yeah No Shit Sherlock! I own a mirror!!)
2) The Premature Uncle: When you are close to near dead perfect bald in your early twenties, your nephews and nieces will have no problem believing you are their uncle. A young guy in sports shoes and long, luscious hair will be rarely called uncle because he looks like their elder brother. But the bald uncle will soon hear choruses of uncle even from strangers just a year below his age. And it will hurt the most coming from women your age.
3) The Ladies Repellent: "Looks don't matter". Says the Handsome (And People Magazine Voted Sexiest Man of the Year) to a Fugly Girl in a naive and vanity-fair Romantic-Comedy Film. Everyone desires a good looking mate. And bald men fall on one of the lower runt of the desirability ladder. They need few grace saving features such as well toned body, dimpled smile. Sad Fact: None of us can really look like Vin Diesel, Dwayne Johnson or Bruce Willis.
4) Thwarted Hero Ambitions: If you wanted to be a lead actor in films, especially Hindi Cinema, please forget those ambitions. We pride on casting the bald guy as the character actor, serial killer or villain. You are never going to see yourself cast as the lead hero saving the day in a Hindi Film.

5) Delusions Of Grandeur:
                                          What you think Your Bald will look Like

                                       What your bald will actually look like
1) Easy Pickings for Villain Casting: With bald on your side, you are guaranteed to be cast as a villain! You can be the epitome of evil and beat the crap out of that McDreamy Hero A-Hole whose dimple and 18 pack of abs made you a stereotype Villain. (I am already ready for Agneepath 2."What you come with? What you gonna go with? In the end, will be left only one man, Superhuman, Superman -Kancha, Baby!")
2) No Personal Grooming worries: The biggest worry of men's lives-which shampoo to use and how to comb the hair.Huh uh, Not for Bald Men! The whole vicious cycle of falling for the insecurity-feeding men grooming industry is broken! So now if a girl still rejects you, no it was not because of the hair or the dandruff.
3) Well aerated head: "Felt the wind in your hair? No I feel it on my bare skin and it’s more awesome!"

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